SWIHA Blog

Forgiveness

For centuries this word has been touted as a nonnegotiable for the betterment of society and the individual. The problem is, although most of us know that forgiveness is a necessity if we want to live a life free from anger and resentment, many of us struggle with understanding exactly what forgiveness means or how to achieve it. After all, forgiveness is merely a blanket term… Used to describe what people should do when faced with the pain of hurt or betrayal. Unfortunately, religious texts and enlightened spiritual leaders frequently fail to describe precisely what forgiveness is, why we should do it, or how it can be attained. With the aim of bridging these gaps, I’ll attempt to answer these questions throughout the course of this blog. Before we get to those answers, let’s first talk a little bit about what forgiveness is not and what it does not do.

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‘Happy Father’s Day’ does not always seem to fit for some people who had less than an ‘A+’ experience with their fathers.  The ‘A’ often stands of Abusive, Abandonment, or Awfully-emotionally-unavailable.

Long ago, I learned to celebrate the lessons my father gifted me as a child of an Alcoholic father.  Yes, I have an overdeveloped sense of responsibility; yes, I highly prefer to be ‘in control’, and yes, I tend to ‘do it myself’ because I can predict the results.  While I have had to learn to temper and refined all these qualities I inherited as a result of who my father was, in the end, they have served me well.

The last lesson my father taught me has most shaped my life.  It is the importance of being able to imagine. 

My father’s birthday was June 13 and often fell on Father’s Day.  In late December, 20 years ago, my father had just returned from an AA meeting with a burning desire to work the 5^th & 8^th steps:

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The month of October lends itself inherently to the theme of Potential.  It’s a month of transition: days grow shorter, the air cools, and trees shed their leaves in anticipation of a winter nap. It’s the pause before a new chapter, where we reflect on lessons learned while planning for the future.

Ancient Gaels celebrated this mid-point between the autumnal and winter equinoxes with the festival Samhain, meaning “summer’s end”. It marked their harvest time and honored the birth-death-rebirth cycle of Mother Nature through celebrations and rituals. Samhain was eventually incorporated in to Christian culture to take place at the end of October proceeding All Hallows day (November 1^st). We now know it as Halloween!

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‘Happy Father’s Day’ does not always seem to fit for some people who had less than an ‘A+’ experience with their fathers.  The ‘A’ often stands of Abusive, Abandonment, or Awfully-emotionally-unavailable.

Long ago, I learned to celebrate the lessons my father gifted me as a child of an Alcoholic father.  Yes, I have an overdeveloped sense of responsibility; yes, I highly prefer to be ‘in control’, and yes, I tend to ‘do it myself’ because I can predict the results.  While I have had to learn to temper and refined all these qualities I inherited as a result of who my father was, in the end, they have served me well.

The last lesson my father taught me has most shaped my life.  It is the importance of being able to imagine. 

My father’s birthday was June 13 and often fell on Father’s Day.  In late December, 20 years ago, my father had just returned from an AA meeting with a burning desire to work the 5^th & 8^th steps:

Read More