A few weeks ago, I was asked if I wanted to do a 5K Run. I could have easily said, “Oh, I’d like to, BUT I haven’t run in over 30 years.” Instead I said, “Yes, sign me up!”
Staying stuck in a rut, and 'yeah butting' myself has never been my style. My saying YES immediately produced incredible results: I ended up placing 5th in my age group despite all those years of not running. Once I became committed to removing the ‘but’ from my life, I have gotten farther, faster!
As a long-time Transformational cCoach, I have worked with hundreds of people who have come to me for life coaching, saying they want to fast-forward their lives and leave behind the things that hold them back. One of the most powerful exercises I offer them is the opportunity to make a list of all the things they want to do in their lives, yet have not done. After they create the list, they are invited to take the things on their list and add the word ‘but’ to the end of the sentence. These are typical examples:
- I want to start my own business, but...
- It is my deepest desire to be a Yoga Teacher and travel, but...
- I am absolutely committed to taking my gifts out into the world, but...
By simply reading these sentences, do you get the picture? Do you see the limiting belief? The word ‘but’ is a stopper! It’s the beginning of an excuse! It’s one of the things that keeps us from stepping into our personal greatness and manifesting our divine truths.
“Every excuse is a misalignment... think like God... God never uses excuses.” – Wayne Dyer
Let’s look at five powerful way you can kick the ‘but’ attitude!
- Stop stopping yourself. When you choose to replace but, with ‘and’ there’s a dramatic and immediate difference in your life. Shifting to the word ‘and’ adds possibility, rather than removing it.
- I want to start my own business, and . . .
- It is my deepest desire to be a Yoga Teacher and travel, and . . .
- I am absolutely committed to taking my gifts out into the world, and . . .
- Choose your words consciously. Using the word ‘but’ is a habit. A habit behind which meek and passive ways hide ... ways that diminish your presence and participation in life:
- I really want to, but . . .
- It’s easy for you, but . . .
- I was all ready to do it, but . . .
The word ‘but’ is used when we want to indicate a contrast or objection; however the energetic shadow of this destructive, covert little word is easily underestimated. Consider making this commitment: I consciously choose my words! I am ‘but’-free whenever possible! And it’s almost always possible!
- Choose to add to your life! The word ‘and’ adds potential and opens possibility! Consider what happens when you consciously add the word ‘and’ to your life...
- I really want to, and... I will!
- It’s easy for you, and... I’ll consider you a model for my own journey!
- I was all ready to do it, and... I realize that timing is everything! Although I don’t fully understand the delay, I am still committed to moving forward.
When you read these examples, you can almost hear yourself raise the volume slightly when you include the simple, powerful word ‘and.' It encourages you to be open and optimistic about the additional option!
- Open yourself to options! 'But' is boring! There are so many other more interesting and energetic options: although, however, nevertheless, on the other hand, still, though, and yet to name a few!
- I want to start my own business... although the timing may not be right at this time, I'm going to keep dreaming and planning!
- It is my deepest desire to be a Yoga Teacher and travel; on the other hand, as I teach yoga right now, I can assist people in traveling from their heads to their heart.
- I am absolutely committed to taking my gifts out into the world, yet I have many things to learn and master before that destined time!
- Become committed to the commitment.
I’m not talking about a casual agreement to remove ‘but’ from your life; I’m talking about a pledge-like commitment, the way you might give up alcohol or cigarettes. When you make a ‘sacred vow’ to yourself, you create a new sense of accountability and discipline, and your life takes on new clarity! It sounded like this:
- I am powerful to choose!
- I choose to be alcohol-free!
- I am mindfully sober!
After making a powerful commitment like this, it is unlikely that you would choose to drink again, or if you did, you would consciously think about breaking your sobriety. Just as when you choose to be alcohol-free or smoke-free, you can choose to be 'but'-free!
Isn’t that a wild thought? Become sober from the negativity and destructive pull ‘but’. It’s a conscious choice!
- I choose to be 'but'-free, which is excuse-free!
- I choose to be self-empowered, with no if, ands, or "buts" in my life!
One of my favorite metaphysicians of all times is Ralph Waldo Emerson, who said “The mind, once stretched by a new idea, never returns to its original dimensions.” It is my prayer your mind has been sufficiently stretched with the idea that the word ‘but’ does not serve you, especially in the greater, wiser scheme of things.
If you are interested in becoming trained in life coaching yourself, check out the wonderful Certificate and Diploma options SWIHA has to offer here.