Do you think you are good enough?
Do you think you are lovable?
Do you feel you are good enough?
Do you feel you are lovable?
Four simple and easy to answer questions, right? That’s what I thought when I was first introduced to them during my Subconscious Intervention class at the Southwest institute of Healing Arts, taught by Master Hypnotherapist Linda Bennett.
My instant ego thoughts were, “That’s it? That’s what we’re going to spend the whole morning working on?” and then my body was like “Hey cocky lady, watch this magic trick and learn something about yourself! And, while we’re at it, have a giant piece of humble pie and pay attention because it’s about to get real all up in your subconscious.”
Before I get into all of that, let me tell you a little bit about myself first.
Of course, like everyone, I have my imperfections and insecurities. Shocking, I know! For the most part though, I consider myself to be a very outgoing and confident woman. I’ve owned multiple business, I have a background in modeling, I’m intelligent and quick witted, and have a large network of really incredible awe-inspiring friends. So, in the matter of do I think I am lovable and good enough? Well, duh! Yeah, of course I do. That’s a no brainer. I’m a Leo, and in true Leo fashion, I “humbly” have the ego and pride that goes right along with the royal sign. Of course, I am good enough, have you met me!? I’m awesome! Just ask me!
Ok, moving on from the snarky over-dramatized ego trip. I do genuinely pride myself on my confidence level and my ability to overcome challenges and face fears. I am a true practitioner of self-love and have been focusing my business, Unshakable Roots, around helping inspire and empower others to truly fall in love with themselves, while healing the roots of whatever issues need healing. I host workshops and have a book coming out that are all rooted in teaching self-love, self-respect, boundaries, self-worth and empowerment.
Now, when I was first asked these questions, I said ‘Yes’ to all four of them. However, as much as the ego loves to lead us to believe all sorts of untruths and does an amazing job convincing us of the best and worst case scenarios all of the time, the body doesn’t lie. During the class, I learned various ‘muscle testing techniques’, and though I was familiar with some of the basics, this time the ‘muscle testing’ went into a deeper level – and when combined with hypnotherapy techniques, wow, it completely blew me away!
Yes, I indeed have no problem convincing myself and thinking that I am good enough and lovable. However, I “failed” on both of the “feel” questions. When I was muscle tested for the truth about the statements “I feel that I am good enough and I feel I am lovable”, my weak response shocked me. I was puzzled as to why I tested weak to the statement involving ‘feeling.’ I mean, I’ve done years and years of self-work, healing old wounds. I have dug deep and allowed myself to be open, raw and vulnerable in all of my classes at SWIHA, which are designed to help us process and heal.
How is it possible that through all of the work I have done on myself, that I would “feel” not good enough and unlovable?
In the class, we learned how to go back to the ‘age of decision’ -- the age when we very first decided that we weren’t good enough or lovable. Some people went early into their childhood. Some discovered they made the decision before even coming into this world, and, for a rare few, it was something held over from a past life. For me, though, the ages were 14 and 25. The age 25 was easy to figure out on the surface level -- it was one of the worst years of my life, I was told almost daily, by the people closest to me that I was horrible at everything I did. When the age of 14 tested significant, that was a little trickier to figure out and took a lot of digging and processing. Overall, I realized it was my freshman year. A lot goes on all levels in that transition age, so logically it made sense even though I struggled pinpointing the exact moment.
What is absolutely fascinating to me, and one of the reasons I began to pursue Hypnotherapy in the first place, is ‘cell memory trauma’. When things happen to us, our bodies and subconscious mind hold onto these events. Our conscious (ego) mind processes these events and creates stories around what we perceived happened. We often take on a victim mentality and create stories that make us feel better in some way and through the years we retell the stories from our one-sided perception, with very little understanding of anything else that took place outside of ourselves in these events.
Using the ‘age of decision’ technique was a fascinating way to go back and look at what really happened in those moments. Most people are able to gain a different perspective and gain compassion for others that were involved. These defining moments can sometimes be very emotionally charged for someone, or they can be very light and seemingly trivial to us now. I had a classmate who had a defining moment of feeling ‘ not good enough’ over a glue stick situation in 1st grade. I myself have subconsciously been feeling unlovable since I was 14 over a book report incident! My classmate and I both said aloud, “Really?”
The truth is when you are a child and you are learning how to process emotions . . . and something hurtful happens, at that time in your life, the littlest things can seem like the biggest deal. These little moments lay imprints in our ‘cell memory’ and though we move forward and ‘forget’ the experiences, they were still very much a part of our development and are still impacting us from our deep subconscious levels.
Again I affirm, I have done a lot of work on myself over many years and am constantly improving myself. However, by getting to the roots of these simple questions I have been able to reframe, understand, clarify, process, and release the pain that was caused in these moments. I’ve written this whole article and I haven’t even started to explain how tremendous of an impact such a simple process has had on me. As confident as I thought I was, I can now see that I’ve carried with me a very dark, heavy weight for a long time. It’s one of those things that you just kind of accept and get used too. Similar to how someone that has back pain and no one can find a solution … they just live with it and eventually kind of numb out to it. It’s still there . . . and you know it, however you learn to ignore it. I’ve carried deep, heavy energy for all of those years and now, I genuinely feel so different!! I have more energy, I see things differently, and I feel better and happier than I have in decades. It shows in all parts of my life as well -- my vibration is higher than ever and I am finally really feeling like I am in flow with life again. Why? Because I actually FEEL good enough and lovable!!!
Who would have thought that four simple questions, and less than an hour of guided self-work could transform and shake the whole foundation of one’s being? Subconscious Intervention, using muscle-testing, is one of the strongest techniques I have learned. If you haven’t already had this done, I highly recommend a scheduling a session with an experienced and confident practitioner. I myself am available for sessions or you are always encouraged to reach out to our SWIHA community to find a practitioner or student that is the right fit for you. You can go to www.GreatGraduates.com to seek for practitioners who have graduated from the college and who are now actively serving clients. Also, those who are going through the Hypnotherapy program must do 30 hours of sessions work and are always looking for volunteers. To learn more about the student hypnotherapy, click here: On Campus Hypnotherapy Clinic.
To contact me, please go to Tami Sharp – Unshakable Roots – Blessings
About the Author, Tami Sharp
Tami Sharp is a Certified Lifestyle Priorities Coach and Clinical Hypnotherapy Practitioner specializing in Mind-Body Wellness and Integrative Holistic Healing. She is the founder and creator of Unshakable Roots, where she works one-on-one and in group settings with clients seeking their own answers into the dis-ease, discomfort, and unhappiness in their lives. Keep in touch with Tami: [email protected] – www.unshakableroots.com – facebook.com/unshakableroots.